THE GLORY OF AUTUMN

Autumn

by Christopher Brennan

“Autumn: the year breathes dully towards its death,

beside its dying sacrificial fire;

the dim world’s middle-age of vain desire

is strangely troubled, waiting for the breath

that speaks the winter’s welcome malison

to fix it in the unremembering sleep:

the silent woods brood o’er an anxious deep,

and in the faded sorrow of the sun,

I see my dreams’ dead colours, one by one,

forth-conjur’d from their smouldering palaces,

fade slowly with the sigh of the passing year.

They wander not nor wring their hands nor weep,

discrown’d belated dreams! but in the drear

and lingering world we sit among the trees

and bow our heads as they, with frozen mouth,

looking, in ashen reverie, towards the clear

sad splendour of the winter of the far south.”

 

 

Damp hands, cold feet, closed bedroom windows.

The changing of the colors on the maple trees.

Intent, short limbed children scurrying to catch the waiting bus

While avoiding the glare of the schedule stressed driver.

Football frenzy, the end days of wine on the deck

Dew on the windshield; time to cover the roses.

Testing the snow blower – yes the northern winds beckon.

 

As so eloquently written by Christopher Brennan

“Autumn: the year breathes dully towards its death”

One wonders if this is a metaphor for life..the inevitable

eeath which comes to us all.

Brennan discusses the oncoming splendor of winter –

is there also the death which comes with autumn and the

resurrection in the form of spring time?

 

Choices, we all have choices.  Life can be a flat lined late autumn

where we anticipate the inevitability of  breathing towards our

death.  Sleep walking in a prolonged haze as the calendar turns over

month after month. Existing despite our selves. We bemoan our

health, the economy, the success of others, the

foibles in our family. Life is just a pain in the butt. 

 

Choices, we all have choices. Anticipatory types  prosper by sharing

their talents with others.  Life is one of  reveling in the morning

dawn. Of  helping human kind prepare for and endure the winters of

travail.  Their mirror of life reflects the goodness found in

others.  Autumn seekers who look outward to help with the

common good.

 

Faith, Hope and Charity. 

 

Choices, we all have choices.  Autumn in our lives is an opportunity

for change.  Whether 40 degrees in Milwaukee or 80 in West Palm

Autumn Awaits Our Choices

Beach, now is the time to reflect:

• Am I breathing dully my last breathe toward my physical, psychological, and    ociological death – or is this a season of personal rejuvenation? 

 

Will the tree of life you sit under live again in the spring – or stay

dormant when the seasons change?

RIGHT ON THE EDGE OF DISCOMFORT

The early fall breeze suddenly bends the tree tops

Carried forth from the north .

Jackets, hoodies, blankets appear.

There is a bit of discomfort – but not yet on the edge.

Short spits of rain walk with their friends the north wind.

Enough for head scarves to appear from hidden satchels.

 Ohh! From the crowd.. a muttered “wave” from the

dignified crowd of theatre patrons at American Players Theatre.

There is a bit of discomfort – but not yet on the edge.

Offering my neighbor apart of my blanket to share

She smiled, leaned forward on her cane and ..

“ I’m fine” she demurred.  

Adrienne S McGee grinned and at the urging of her companions,

 shared the phrase “ Right on the Edge of Discomfort”.

The author? “  Me” !.

What does it mean ?

“ RIGHT ON THE EDGE OF DISCOMFORT”,  defines the knife’s edge,

The tip of the blade, the very narrow illuminating band wherein

there is an absence of comfort,  but neither the presence of pain.

One senses, feels, know the anguish and negative happenings

associated with discomfort, potential life changing decisions.

The “edge” may involve weather related pain, or physical changes.

More often it is the intuitive sense of knowing “ it is action time”.

Right on the edge… I must make a change, take action, be assertive.

Our comfort zone has enabled us to be cautious, comfortable, to

Procrastinate, to ignore the warning flags of relationships, job situations,

Financial missteps which are an inconvenience …not a tsunami.

Life carries on – acceptable if not perfect.

Right on the edge is our internal motivator.

Whether it be :

• Work/life balance
• The intimacy of relationships
• Financial spending patterns
• Our physical health
• Career decisions
• The friends we choose

The decisions we make, and the  permutations resulting, may take us to the edge of discomfort.

Only then are we motivated to act: to change, to improvise, to become our true selves.

The clarion alarm bells ring In our psyche.  Act – or the percentage of discomfort  goes over the center

line of the tipping point. 

It is within each of our capabilities to recognize the potential gains from psyche awareness: developing  ndividual life strategies, holding ourselves accountable , AND  being PROUD of the actions we take.

There is much to be said for a healthy ego and internal acts of congratulations.

Recognize the precipice at the Edges of Discomfort for what it is- an opportunity for growth and happiness.

Pondering life's decisions

THE PRICE OF WAR AS TOLD BY A HERO

A tribute well deserved

 

People back home told him war is hell..

What is hell on the battlefields?

Seventeen years old (lied about his age) he found

himself resting against a tree on an island in the South Pacific.

The scent of mortars  filled the air. Small arms fired crackled.

Blood, guts, cries for “mother” laid all around.

Victory, what a price was being  paid.

 

One day after landing, several days out of boot camp, he

came face to face with death, screaming buddies, the smoke, sound and fury

of both sides fighting for their very lives.

The sheer terror caused his body to shake, his eyes always searching the brush

for his Japanese killers.

 

Physically exhausted, he rested against a tree: helmet by his side.

What were the marks ? Either side of the helmet bore the creases of

bullets: he survived  by inches the fate of the Gods.

With others, he charged up hills to confront  Japanese caves and nests: life hanging in the

balance: kill or be killed.. Firing into huts: hearing screams: watching others die.

 

The seemingly endless nightmare returns to this day.. now we call it Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.

 

Proud of his service: wondering WHY  he survived when those around him died,

This 80 something patriot talks wistfully of the war.  Tough, wizened,  laughter on

The outside, years of pain on the inside.

 Rubbing his nose, eyes glistening from tears, part of the past comes rushing  back. He looks away,

paces the floor, grapples for the right words.  Shoulders bow, one sees the memory tapes

passing before his eyes: the smells, sounds , and consequences of the war and life since are

evident..  he tries to hold back – but there is a need for him to share, to talk, to again relieve

the pain of life’s journey. To share his story so that those who follow benefit from history.

 

Three marriages,   businesses created, relationships moving on:

It took 30 years to begin the recovery from being .

“Always the need for excitement, the desire to be in control , to survive”,

The ghosts of the cries of buddies dying  on the battlefields  –

Those for  whom he really cared– true men friends for the 1^st time in his life.

 

The fear lingers deep in his soul fear that  in life there is no permanency, or trust, or faith.

Seventy years have passed into the annals of history.

Why me he asks, why did I survive and others beside me die?

 

He carries his military exploits close to his chest

Not a chest pounding hero

A small Semper Fidelis  sticker on his vehicle

 

Marriages unraveled , children without a family

Money squandered: Johnny Walker consumed by the gallons.

Fear, like a low grade fever, is always present. Trust whom?

The ripple effects of combat inexorably, silently pass from generation to generation.

One , just one of the unspoken prices paid by the “ Greatest Generation”.

 

 

LIFE CHOICES THAT MOLD US

Odorless, colorless, tasteless.

Sometimes there is a chill, other times frothy heat.

Skin crawls, foreheads sweat, thighs tingle.

Faceless, yet the visage is familiar.

With a smile, it permeates the soul.

 

Choices, this mystic provides the human side of us all with choices.

Messages are unspoken, so why do we understand

each and every nuance? Every phrase, every entendre?

 

Unexpected, unplanned, unwanted, our inner voice posits itself at our footstool

when we are strong, weak, vulnerable, protected, asleep or in the noonday sun.

Alone or with others.

 

Clothed in the garments of familiarity,  choices are often mundane, ordinary, familiar.

Decisions seem easy – yet there is this nagging sense that there are subtexts

to what is behind door A. 

Down the road, there are opportunities and rewards; risks and demise

 

Life  choices which impact who we are and who we will become.

Familiarity clothed in the people with whom we associate, business relationships,

Organizations we join, people we choose to be our friends.

Ethics we choose to espouse  to follow or ignore.

Choices. Conscious choices made one step at a time along life’s path.

Choices. Some non refundable: unchangeable: life altering.

Choices are made consciously ( subconscious choices – not an ingredient).

Choices – Are you prepared when the next messenger comes visiting?